Guys, I did it. I made it to 18 without having a girlfriend. My goal has been accomplished. Now it is time to reveal myself as THE SEXIEST MAN ALIVE!
1. Who you are now is not who you will be in 10 years. It is okay to be somebody new 10 minutes from now. We are always learning. We are always growing. If you realized 10 seconds ago that you don’t like who you are, shed your skin, retry, replant yourself in good soil.
2. Cleaning is instant therapy. When your brain is muddy, take a shower, wash your hands, change your clothes. Spend 15 minutes straightening your living room. When you are angry, scrub things. I know it’s crazy but it works instantly.
3. Forgive someone’s debt if it’s under 50 dollars, forgive the small things, give a little time to yourself and forgive the big things too. Forgiveness isn’t about the other person, it’s about you. That being said - if someone ever hurts you in a way that would make me cry to know, you get out of there, my love. You just get up and go.
4. Gum karma is real and if you spit out a piece in public expect to find some on your shoe in the future. Same goes for insults and harsh judgement, too.
5. Do what you love and the money will follow.
6. Live your life with an open palm and give as much as you can and as often. At some point in your life, someone will lend you 50 bucks when you’re down on your luck. Remember how that feels. Remember to give that back.
7. Always wear clean underwear. You’ll thank me later.
8. There is a difference between being kind and being passive and there are those who cannot see that difference. They will try to walk all over you. Never bend your knees for those who do.
9. Have faith. Have faith in god or people or yourself or science or in luck or in all of the above. Faith is what keeps us going, faith is what keeps us strong.
10. Pay your bills on time whenever you can, although money is nothing. Remind yourself that.
11. Do not forget you were once ignorant of all you know now. Be patient of anyone who hasn’t had the education you have. Speak at the level of the person you are with - it’s not playing dumb, it’s being considerate. There’s no reason to make them feel uncomfortable. Plus then when someone starts going off about their superior IQ, you can cut them to pieces and watch their face when you do.
12. You are the best person in the room for one particular thing, and that’s confidence. You are the worst person in the room for another thing, and that’s humility. Use both carefully.
13. Never make fun of someone’s beliefs or superstitions, let your kid keep their imaginary friend and let your best buddy believe in knocking on wood. We all have security blankets. Don’t take away someone else’s.
14. Try to learn something new every day.
15. The worse you look, the more likely you are to run into someone you know so instead of feeling awkward, learn to be confident in sweats while talking to your friends.
16. Never go to bed angry, it will ruin your sleep and make tomorrow even harder. Find a way to relax. Don’t let today get to your head.
17. Think before you speak. When someone says something, mull over their words before answering. This is called listening, it is different than hearing.
18. What keeps love beautiful is that there’s risk involved. If he breaks your heart and it doesn’t hurt, it wasn’t love in the first place.
19. Never let someone else determine who you are or how happy. You are too strong to be torn apart.
20. I love you, even when we are fighting, even when I am fast asleep. Don’t doubt it for an instant. You are my everything.
- Go to a party and stay sober. Listen to the way your drunk classmates talk when they don’t plan to remember tonight when they wake up. Never talk about these experiences, just keep them for yourself.
- Start driving in one direction on the highway after school one day, pretending like you’re running away. Blast bad pop music and sing along. Stop in the suburbs when your mom calls you to come home, but buy your little brother a cupcake before you turn back around.
- Kiss your best friend. It doesn’t matter what sexuality or gender you are or they are. It doesn’t matter if it’s a peck or you escalate to tongue. You’ll laugh about it later, but it will always make you smile just for the memory.
- Smoke a cigarette. Let it burn your throat. Cough, loudly.
- Take a stand for something you believe in. When half your school laughs at you, take it with pride. Someone agrees, even if they’re too scared to say so.
- Make enemies. Make the kind of mistakes that cause your life to implode. Lose everyone and everything to these mistakes. Only when you fall will you find out that you can pick yourself back up.
- Sit on someone’s roof and talk for hours. Forget about dinner and tell your origin stories. Let your guard down while the dog barks below. Talk about god. Listen.
- Steal Bourbon from your parents’ liquor cabinet and put it in a water bottle beneath your bathroom sink. Spike your tea with it when you think you’ve hit rock bottom. Pour the whole thing down the drain when it’s too strong for you.
- Become a stereotype. Buy a record player and combat boots. Wear all black. Dye your hair bright blue and get your ear pierced three times. Don’t care when people laugh at you.
- Make wishes at 11:11. Wear your pajamas backwards in the hopes of a snow day. Look for answers at the bottom of a bottle. Pretend writing things on your arms makes you special. Believe in anything. Believe in everything. Open every book and look around every corner. You’ll never look like this or move like this or think like this again. Enjoy it while it lasts or hate every second. But feel. Feel every damn thing.
my best friend just realized 30 minutes before her curfew that she’s an hour away from home in the most dangerous part of the city alone with the buses no longer running so she calls the police to take her home i cant stop laughing
update the cop that came to pick her up is a hot 20 year old guy thats flirting with her and now im not laughing anymore
SHE FUCKING HOOKED UP WITH THE COP
Plot twist: he wasn’t a cop.